the Nixionary

At our monthly faculty meetings, the administration lays out a spread of treats for the taking at seven in the morning. At the last one, I sat across from the teacher who sometimes falls asleep in her neck. This is what she ate– and I am not exaggerating a single crumb. Being incredulous [...]

Wigs are wierd. Ms. Bankler, the lady doing my teaching observation for the state, may or may not wear a wig. It’s red and shifty and luscious. I would give her head the benefit of the doubt, but she has such old eyes, I can’t totally trust what’s above them as being [...]

It’s so hot and humid here, I wore shorts to school today and Mr. El, who wears sweatpants, slippers with soles on them (so that he can pretend they’re shoes), and an untucked stained polo shirt, said, first thing, “Teachers aren’t allowed to wear shorts.”
So I said, “Yes, they are.”
And he said, “Well then I’m [...]