Turducken

Here's a little heart and soul for you straight outta Louisiana.* Actually three hearts. Maybe no souls. But soul food for sure.* The Thanksgiving tradition here is to buy a little BEHEMOTH packaged bird feast called "Turducken." It's a huge turkey, stuffed with a duck, which is, in turn, stuffed with a chicken. The butchers (or you, if you're good at filling dead animal caverns with delicacies) pack all of the glorious cavities of the birds with three different types of stuffing and...SAUSAGE. The icing on the heart attack cake.

Ashley and I went to pick one up today on the West Bank.

"I'm hungry," I told her during our fourth U-turn.

"Well after we go pick up this thirty pound bird with a bird inside it with a bird inside it, we can hit McDonald's on the way home."

So my holistic hopefulness might have just gone down the gravy drain.

See- I bet cavemen didn't die of food-induced heart attacks.*

*Contradictions in the above have been noted. Comments still appreciated and digested by all five senses.